Hindi Facebook Jokes Status and Messages

Boyfriend bana lo kripa shuru ho jayegi

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Girl: Baba mere mobile me Balance nahi rehta
 kya karu
 .
 NIRMAL Baba: "#Boyfriend hai ki nahi
 Girl: nahi..
 .
 Baba: bas isliye hi kripa ruki hai,
 Boyfriend bana lo kripa shuru ho jayegi.. 

'Z Kutta Haaye Haaye Z Kutta Haaye Haaye Jab Saabiq Sadar Ayub Khan Ko Awam Ne Gaali Di Thi To Unho Ne Isteefa De Diya Tha. Samajh TO Gaye Ho Gey. Fwd If You Love Your Pakistan and Your Nation.'

'Maah-e-Ramzan Ki Aamad Mubarak. You are Invited on 21st Roza at Lasania Restaurant Islamabad K Paas Wali Masjid Main. :-)'

'Thukra ke usne mujhko, kaha ki muskuraao! Maine has diya, aakhir sawal uski khushi ka tha. Maine khoya woh jo mera tha hi nahi, Usne khoya wo jo sirf usi ka tha.'

Girl in a party to a man: Excuse me sir kia aap mere FACE se 1 cheez hata sakte hain? Man (KHUSH hoe huye): HAAN haan Zaroor bolo kia? Girl: Manhoos aadmi apni nazrien.'

'Rat darkht pe 1 bulbul udas beta tha.. 1 jugnu ne dekh k pucha "tu abi tk ghar nhi gaya? Bulbul: zantalaqa ta kho kona ke UPS fit kare dy, mung kara bijli nishta.'

Dulha May I Kiss You Darling

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Dulha #Romantic Andaaz mein Bola
 May I Kiss U Darling ?
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 Dulhan Sharmate Hue Boli
 Hamne To kabhi Gairon ko bhi Manaa Nai kiya,
 Aap Toh Fir bhi Apne Ho :P

'Doctor -aapki Biwi sirf 5 ghante ki mehmaan hai Husband - koi baat ni Doctor Sahab jidhar 25 saal nikal giye udhar 5 ghante aur sahi'

'Dard me koi mousam pyara nahi hota, Dil ho pyasa to pani se gujara nahi hota. Koi dekhe to humari bebasi, Hum sabhi k ho jate hain Par koi humara nahi hota.'

'Sardar2 pandit: ye sar pe choti kyo? pandit: ye ANTENNA he,isse ache vichar ate he SARDAR: Kmal he mere sr pr Dish Tv he fir b kuch nhi ata'

'Hum Ne Kab Manga hai, tum se Muhabat ka sila ''Chikny '' bus kabhi raste men milo to chommi dey diya karo....... :-D'

Facebook Ke Bahar Bhi Duniya Hai

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Papa: Beta Facebook Ke
 Bahar Bhi Ek Duniya Hai..!!
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 Beta: Oh Really Papa….??
 Zara Link To Send Karna Uska 

'Saas: Anay do maray betay ko,usko bataongi tumhare kartot Bahu:Koi fayda nhi wo meri hi bat manega Saas: Q? Bahu: Q k tum beth k samjhao gi aur mein lait k.'

'Ek Pathan k Dil ki khuahish: Ary koi hai . . Koi hai Allah ka banda Koi Ramzan mai itna toh meherbani kr do Pepsi ko choro, Niswar pe 5 Rs. Kam kr do...:-D'

'china cricket q nai khelta?? . . . . . q k technical problem ha. . . sb k face 1 jese hain jo out ho jae wohe moo dho k phr se aa skta ha

Breaking News Balochistan C.M Nawab Aslam Raeesani Ne Zohar Ki Azaan Sun Ker Roza Khol Dia ...Un Se Pucha Gaya Tou Unho'n Ne Jawab Dia ... "Azan Azan Hoti Hy Maghrib Ki Ho Ya Zohar Ki ..." =P'

'Wife:-lagta hai hamari beti ki kisi Ladke k sath Setting ho gayi Husband:Wo kaise? Wife:-kafi dino se mobile ReCharge k Paise Nahi Mang Rahi'

Husband to Wife Call Me

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Husband: Call Me Shonu
 Wife: Mera Shona Babu.

 Husband : arrrrre.,,,Call Me Sweetheart
 Wife : my sweetu ... Sweetheart.

 Husband: ufffff ...... Call Me Honey..
 Wife: Mera hannu darling.

 Husband : O pagal Aurat, call kar mujhe,
 balance nahi hai
 Wife: Oho ... ok ok... Abhi karti hu! :P

'Clge me Lecture chal raha tha 1 ldka achanak uthkar clas k bhar gya Ltr:ye bahar Q gaya? Ldke ka dost: sir!usko nind me chalne ki aadat hai.'

'3 habshi dost ikathy ja rahay the k achank 1 pari i or kaha k mai tum 3 ki 1,1 wish pori karo gi 1st:mai white or handsome hona chata hn.pari ne us ko white or handsome kr dia 2nd wale ne bhi ye hi wish ki. us ki bhi wish pori ho gai. 3rd wala hans raha tha . pari ne bola haso mat wish kro, 3rd wala:in dono ko phir kala k...ar do. moral:frndz hote hi kaminay hain:-)'

'A Lady call 2 a fire Brigade Office: Mere Ghar main Aag Lag Gai hay Sardar: Pani Dalo.. Lady: Dala Aag Nahi Bujhi. Sa Sardar: Fer asi ki Kariye asi v te pni e Stna A. Ssa'

'*"* Bacha Dadi se. Dadi kya hm hmesha 5 hi rhenge? Aap, papa, mom, baji aur m, Dadi, nhi tmari shadi hogai to hm 6 hojaenge, Bacha, phr baji ki shadi hogai to phr 5 hojaenge, Dadi pyar se, Tmara beta hojaega to phr 6 hojaenge, Bacha, Tm mar jaogi to hm phr 5 hojaenge, Dadi. Harm khor so ja chup kr k.*"*'

Tumhari Kidney Fail Ho Gayi Hai

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Doctor: Tumhari Kidney Fail Ho Gayi Hai..!
 .
 Ye Sun kar Pehle To Pappu Bahut Roya
 Fir Achanak Kuchh Soch Kar Bola.
 Pappu: Kya Doctor Sahab,
 Aap Bhi Bahut Mazaak Karte Ho,
 .
 Meri Kidney Kabhi School Hi Nahi Gayi,
 To Fir Fail Kaise Hogi..!?!
 Doctor Shocks...Pappu Rocks...!! 

'shadi me 1 chodri bohat der se khana ka rha tha ksi ne pocha kab tak khaoge CHODRI:mai to khud tang hon pr kya krun card me likha tha DINNER:7pm 2 10pm'

police wala ek student ko pakr leta hy STUDENT:sir me student hoo mujy chor do POLICE:tm bina licence k motar cycle chalte ho? STUDENT:ni POLICE:cafe jaty ho? STUDENT:ni POLICE:oye to phr tu kis baat ka student hai. pao aenu lamya:'

'Dadi: Omer???? Omer: Dadi Eik Minute... Dadi: Array Omer??? Omer: Daadiii Aikkk Minuteeeee.. Dadi: Omerrrrrrrrrr???? ............ ............ Omer: Budhi Ruk ja Aata hun ...Potty kar raha hoon...'

': Barey Zalim hen teri Gali k bache "Faraz Kutta peeche laga k kehte hen,Ashiqon ki speed dakho:..'

'Lo g sun Lo University of Lahore Girls hostle me 1 girl boy k sath bathroom me nahate hue pakri gayi Us boy ka naam hy "LIFE BOY" apki soch ko salam :'

'Crickt stadium me 1 lrki ne face pr flag bnaya hua tha 1 saraiki pas aya or zor se kiss kr k bola: ommm..ahhh! Meda mittha Pakistan.'

Husband Main Dubai ja raha hun

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Husband: Main #Dubai ja raha hun
 Wife: Mere liye jewellery lana

 Husband: #Paris ja raha hun
 Wife: Mere liye cosmetics lana

 Husband: #London ja raha hun
 Wife: Perfumes leke aana

 Husband: #Narak mein ja raha hun
 Wife: #Bhagwan ka diya sub kuch hai
 bas tum apna khyal rakhna..!!!

'Mitho: yaar sadi miss kehndi a k majj da dood peen naal dimagh taiz hunda aey.. Pappu: Gupp maar de a jey aey gal hondi tey majj da katta Engineer ya Doctor na hunda...

'Jab se begum ne mujhe murgha bana rakha hai, Main ne nazron ki tarhan sir bhi jhuka rakha hai, Bartano aaj mere sir pe baraste kion ho ? Mein ne dho dha k tumhain kitna saja rakha hai, Roz leti he talashi wo police ki manind, Pochti he kahan paison ko chupa rakha hai, Wahi duniya main muqaddar ka sikandar tehra, Jis ne khud ko yahan shadi se bacha rakha hai, Pi ja is maar ki talkhi ko bhi has k shohar, Mar khane mein bhi qudrat ne maza rakha hai.. {k,k}'

'*"* Boy. A bewafa tu n dil jala dya, Dil ko jala kr raakh bna dya, GIRL, Teri ye qurbani bekar nhi jaegi, Raakh idhr bhej de " Bartan dhone" k kam aaegi'

'Sales man: Pa ji Cockroach k liye Powder ley lo. Sardar: Na pa jee Cockroach nu ena v free ni karna, Aj Powder lay dita te kal Body Spray mangey ga:

'Ek admi park me apni BV k sath betha tha k itny mein 1 ur aurat uski BV k pas aa kr boli. Paise pehle le lena, ye aadmi baad main boht drama karta ha.'

*. . .Aqal Mand Aur Samaj Dar Admi Jb Koi Khas Aur Eham Faisla Krta Hy, To Apni Ankhein Band Krta Hy, Bohat Sochta Hy, Apne Dil Ki Sunta Hy, Apne Dimagh Ko Use Krta Hy, Aur Akir Main Wohi Krta Hy Jo.? . . . . . .. ? Us Ki Biwi Kehti Hy. . .*

Bhagwan mujhe swarg mein aane do

Posted by M K D, Admin

 1st Aadmi : Bhagwan main #Doctor hoon
 aur maine logo ki bahot sewa ki hai
 mujhe #swarg mein aane do.

 #Bhagwan: Nahi tum andar nahi aa sakte.

 2nd Aadmi: Bhagwan main Brahmin hoon
 aur maine sari zindagi aapki pooja ki hai
 mujhe swarg mein aane do.

 Bhagwan : Nahi tum bhi andar nahi aa sakte.

 3rd Aadmi: Prabhu main shaadi shuda hoon.....

 Bhagwaan: Bas kar pagle rulayega kya,
 chal andar swarg mein aaja.... 

'Girle in mariage party: xcuse me!kia ap meray chahray se 1 cheez hta saktay hain Boy khush hotay howay, Han Han bolo kia? Girle: apny MANHOOS nazrain..:-D'

'"Aakhon me noor hai" "Chehre pe surour hai" "Koi larki mangey mera 'Numbr' to de dena" Q k Meri shadi abhi bohat dooR hai (''.)/' ) ) oye yad nal _/"\_'

'Yoon mat kheench mujhe apni tarf Meri jaan... " yeh new-Shirt phat gai to main chamat Wamat laga doonga.'

'GIRL: O BHAI-JAAN Please rasta do. . . BOY: Tum Larkiyan itna Confuse Kyun Karti Ho Ya To 'BHAI' Bolo Ya 'JAAN' ;-'

'Kya aapki girl friend ke paas yeh sab hai..? Sulagta Jism Nashili Aankhen Kapkapate Hont Thartharata Badan Agar hai To usko DENGI VIRUS hai. TAKE CARE!'

Jewellery Shop Mein Santa Ki Pitayi

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Jewellery Shop Mein #Santa Ki,
 Zabardast Pitayi Ho Gai.....
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 Y ?
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 Santa Ne Sales-Girl Se Kaha:-
 Aapki Ek Ek Item Gazab Ki Hai,
 Sone Ka Kya Rate Lengi..... haha 

'1 Larki raat ko film dekhnay k baad galti se boys hostel main chali gai to subah ko uski saheliyon ne pocha konsi film dekhi? Girl : pehlay to "Rab ne bana di jori Phir sab ne banaya ghori...:-'

'"Aaey DiL Tu TANHAIYON Mein Rehny Ka AADi HoJa." . . Ye Tery Lanti Dost Tujhy Kisi Achi Bachi Ka Number Nahi Dein Gay.;'

'Aik khargosh roz lohaar ki dukan p jata or kehta: GAJAR hai? lohaar inkar kr deta. Aik din lohaar ko ghussa aya or us ne khargosh k dant torr diye. Phir Phir kya...? Agle din khargosh aya Or bola: GAJAR KA JUICE HAI... ;-):-D'

'"Jo shaks apni jaib kharch se apne dost ki DAWAT krta hai, kamyabi hmesha us k kdam chomti hy. Fir kal . aawan??'

Pappu ko ek lawaris bandar mila

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Pappu ko ek lawaris #bandar mila.
 Wo usko police station le gya.
 Inspector ne kaha, isko #Zoo le ke jayo...

 Next day #inspector ne pappu ko
 bandar ke sath bus stop par dekha,

 Inspector: isko zoo nahi le kar gaye???

 #Pappu: kal gaye the,
 khoob ghume, bada maza aaya,
 .
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 Aaj Qutub Minar jaa rahe hain... 

'DAMAD Ji, pehli baar Susral gaye. Gaon walon se pocha: "Yahan koi Enjoy karne ki cheez hai kia?" Gaon walay bolay: "Nhi babu, Ek hi thi woh aap le gaye....'

'Honton ko chhuwa usney ehsaas ab tk hy Aankhen nam or saanson mey aag ab tk hy Waqt guzar gya Pr uski yaad nhi gai Uff Wo HARI MIRCH ka suwaad ab tk hai....'

'Sharabi DARU se tang aa gaya 3 botly ye keh k tor di.. .. 1st.Teri waja se meri nokri chali gai. .. 2nd teri waja se mera ghar tabah huwa.. .. 3rd Teri waja se mujhy BV chor k chali gai.. .. 4th uthayi to wo bhari hui thi. Usy rakh k bola,, .. TU SIDE ME HOJA TERA KOI KASOOR NAHI.'

*"* 2 Hamshakl Jurwan Bachy Sakht Sardi k Mosam M Apne kamre M bethy Thy, In m s 1 hans hns k loot poot ho rha tha or 2usra udas kone m betha kanp rha tha, Baap n pucha. Tm itna q hans rhy ho? Wo bola kuch nhi papa aj mama n 2ono bar isi ko nehla dya hai. WELCOME WINTER SEASON'

Flight Me Pilot Mic band karna bhool gya

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Flight Me #Pilot Ne Announce Kia :
 'Hum Ek Ghante Me Land Karne Wale Hain."
 .
 Fir Wo Mic Band Karna Bhool Gya Aur
 Co-Pilot Se Bola :
 Abb To Bas Ek Garam Chai Piyunga,
 Fir Air Hostess Ki Pappi Lunga.
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 Air Hostess Ye Sun Kar Mic Band
 Karvane Ke Liye Bhaagi,
 Aur 1 Bachche K Pair Me Fas Kar Gir Gayi.
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 Bachcha Bola : 'Tujhe Badi Jaldi Hai Kamini.
 Suna Nahi? Wo Pehle Chai Piyega..!!! 

'Sher sherni ko kiss karne laga sherni ne roka or idhar udhar dekhne lagi.. Sher:kiya hua..? Sherni: dekh rahi hun aas paas wo manhus National Geographic wale to nahi hain..'

'Lab sil jaate hain.. jab tum samney Aatey ho, dil dharakta hai jab nazren milatey ho.. saans rukti hai jab muskuraty ho.. BHOOT HO KYA?? ITNA KYUN DARate ho.'

'*"* Us Ne kaha, muje muhbt ki saza do, Me ne jaa kr sb kuch uski ammi ko bta dya, Yaaaahoooooo, Jharoo s pitai karwadi uski, *"*'

'Dehaati Mastar bachon ko english parhaate hoe: "Dekho bachon ye 'M' hai... 'M' se mother banta hai. Jese sheeday ki MAA.. Agle din Mastar ne black board per "W" likh kar pucha ye kya hai ??? 1 bacha bola: Sir, yeh to sheeday ki MAA mgr tangain oopar hain.' 'Dehaati Mastar bachon ko english parhaate hoe: "Dekho bachon ye 'M' hai... 'M' se mother banta hai. Jese sheeday ki MAA.. Agle din Mastar ne black board per "W" likh kar pucha ye kya hai ??? 1 bacha bola: Sir, yeh to sheeday ki MAA mgr tangain oopar hain.'

Kya Khaya Aaj Dinner Mein

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Kapil & His Girl Friend on Phone

 Kapil : Kya Khaya Aaj Dinner Mein?
 GF : Tumhe Bas Yehi Baatein Karni Aati Hai..

 Kapil : Ok.. To Yeh Batao..
 How Should RBI Fight These Inflationary
 Trends With Minimum Intervention In The Money Markets?
 .
 >
 GF : Hmmmm.. Maine Khaya Tha
 Daal Chawal And Aalu Ki Sabzji..... 

'Sahab naukrani se: Tum begum sahiba se zayada maza deti ho. Naukrani: G sahab,lekin saaray naukar kehtay hain k begum sahiba tum se zayada maza deti hai?'

'*"* MAAN. beta america s mery lye jawan hone ki dawai bhejna. Bete n america s capsul bhaje or kaha 1 se zyada nh khana . Jb beta america s waps aya to dekha ghr m 1 khubsurt larki ghum rhi h. Beta. Tum kon ho? Me teri maa hun, Beta. Abba kahan h? Maa. Unhn ne 2 kha lye thy wo jhuly m so rhy hen *"*'

'Girl, Na dekh Hasino ko Azab Hoga Tu B ek din kisi Hasina ka Bap Hoga Boy: Khuda kare teri zuban sachi ho Muje Papa kehne wali teri hi bachi ho..B-);-)'

'wife: Aaj koi aisi baat kaho k me khush b ho jaon or jal bhi jaon, Husband: Tum meri zindgi ho Wife: Or, or kya? Husband: aur Lanat hai aisi zindgi pay.'

'wife: Aaj koi aisi baat kaho k me khush b ho jaon or jal bhi jaon, Husband: Tum meri zindgi ho Wife: Or, or kya? Husband: aur Lanat hai aisi zindgi pay.'

Mujhe sab pata hai

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Teacher : Hamesha kaho ki mujhe sab pata hai.
 Chotte : Papa mujhe sab pata hai ;-)
 Papa : beta ye 50 ruppee le aur chup rehna.
 Chotte : Mummy muje sab pata hai ;-)
 Mummy : beta ye 100 ruppee le aur chup rehna.
 Chotte (nokar se): Raamu kaka mujhe sab pata hai ;-)
 Ramu kaka : Aa mera beta apne baap ke gale lag jaa..!! :-P

'Father to Son : Nalaik Haji Nisar ki larki ko dekh wo first ayi hai Son to father; Or kitna daikhoon ussi ko daikh daikh ke to fail howa hoon..'

'Girl = S.H.O se sir Kal 1 admi ne Meri izat loot li Pahle us ne Meri sarhi utari Phir blouse utara,phir brazier Phir Mere mammay dabaey Meri nipples ko choosa Phir panty utari,phir 20 Minutes tak mujhy geela krta raha Phir apna lun Meri choot mei rakh kr Maza leta raha 20 Minutes baad apna lun Meri gand k andar dala or phir jb farikh hony laga To Lun gand se nikala or sari Mony Meri breast pr daal di, S.H.O= hun Ma F.I.R likhan ya Muth Maran'

'*"* KHUSHYN KA MULK PAKISTAN *"* 1. Light aane ki khushi, 2. Bazar m shoping k bad zinda ghr waps aane ki khushi, 3. Bus m seat milne ki khushi, 4. Petrol ki qimtn m 8 rupe ezafe k bad 20 paisy ki kami ki khushi, 5. Namaz parhne k bad Kud kash hamle s bach jane ki khushi, 6. Bus s utarne bad mobile ko apne jaib m dekhne khushi, 7. Masjid s nikalte waqt chapal mil jane ki khushi, KHUSHYN BHARA PAKISTAN.

Lift Chahiye Kya

Posted by M K D, Admin

Ek ladki sadak par akeli jaa rahi thi,
pichhe se ek ladka bola : Ghar tak lift chahiye kya?
Ladki : Bhag jaa harami 3 din se lift le rahi hoon abhi tak ghar nahi pahuchi.

Pyare nooray! Tera msg mila, parh k buht dukh hwa, Meri tarah tu b mujhe bhul ja nooray, ab m 3 bchon ki maa hn aur kaloo Gujjar ki izzat hn plz dil p wattaaa rakh k mery bachn ka aram s mama bn ja ! Faqat, Teri muhbt Hameeda tandur wali *"*'

'1 BV ki requst hy plz is msg ko itna phelao k us k shohar tk pohanch jay or wo razi hojay Dear ASIF plz Eid-ul-Azha mere sath karen plzzz

'Qaid e Azam jinnah 1 bar rastay se ja rahe the, Rastay me kuch Larkian unki shakal dekh kr hasne lagi, Ye dekh kr Qaid e Azam ny farmaya: Aj tum meri shakal dekh kr hans rahi ho!! Lakin yad rakho 1 waqt aaega k tum meri shakal dekh kr shalwar utara karo gi'

Aisa Kyun Kar Rahe Ho

Posted by M K D, Admin

Anil road par nanga bhag raha tha.
Sunil ne usse rok kar poocha: Arre bhai aisa kyun kar rahe ho,
kyun nanga bhag rahe ho, tumhe sharam nahi aati?
Anil: Kyun ki aaj tum jaldi ghar aagaye, Issi liye.

Ek larki ek larkay k paas gye us na ulta kia... Pechay sa khola.. Aur dal dia... Larki bhut khush the wo phle bar dalwa re the... Mobile ma sim card

'Pakar Pakar Hath Mein Pakar Daba Mat Oh Ho Qtry Gr Rhy Hein Jaldi Se Munh May Dal Le Aaha Ab Batao Mza Aya Na Rasgulla Khanay ka:-'

'1 Admi K Haath Ki 6 Ungliyaan Thien. Sub Log Usay "AKBAR"kehte thay Socho Q? . . . . Qk AKBAR Uska Naam tha Aapko Her SmS Main Fankaari Chahiye Bss...!!'

'B0y: tumharay pen main ink nae hai kya Grl: andhay h0 kea chal t0 raha hai B0y : acha t0 apna number t0 likh kr dikha0..!'

'Ek Lady Ne Bus Me Khare Boy Ko Thapar Mara, Boy: Madam Break Lagne Ki Waja Se Dhakka Laga Hai. Lady: 4 Bache Hain Mery..Dhakay Aur Jhatkay Sab Jaanti Hoon.'

Kaam Ke Aadmi

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Kaam Ke Aadmi 
 Ek pagal nanga bazar mein ghoom raha tha
 Uska wo bahot bada tha,
 Ek aurat ne dekha to boli
 Hamara desh tarakki kaise karega
 Saare kaam ke admi to pagal hai

Roz Roz Ka Jhanjhat

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Husband : Main ye roz roz ke condom lagane ki jhanjhat se pareshan ho gaya hoon.
 Wife : To phir tum lamination kyun nahi karwa lete!

'Aik Chunti Hathi K Upar Baith Kr Ja Rahi Thi. Raste Me Kaccha Pull Aa Jata Hai.! Usay Daikh k ChuÑti Boli . . Jaanu! Cross Kr Lo Gy Ya Main UtruÑ.

'Husband ghusse mein apni Bv se bola:dil karta hai k aaj tere tukre tukre kar dun, Parosi ki awaaz aai: Bhai "Mummay" mujhy de dena!'

'A girl asked Nargis: Anti ap k pas car,bangla or itna zaida bank balnce hai ap kya karobar krti hain? Nargis: bus beta chota sa "HOLE" SALE" ka karobar hai.'

Sex Education

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Sunny: Papa, aaj se school mein ek period Sex Education ka bhi shuru ho gaya hai.
 Papa: Good! Lekin tum Lulli kyon hila rahe ho?
 Sunny: Madam ne homework diya hai.

Munna - Munni Duet

Posted by M K D, Admin

 Munni woh din yaad karo
 Jab hum tum sath nahate the,
 Tum chut pe sabun malti thi ,
 Hum land pe jhag udate the.
 Munna woh din beet gaye ,
 Jab hum tum sath nahate the,
 Ab chut chupane ki bari hai,
 Munni bharat ki nari hai.

 Munni woh din yaad karo
 Jab hum tum sath sote the,
 Tum chut mein kheti karti thi ,
 Hum land pe ganne bote the.
 Munna woh din beet gaye ,
 Jab chut mein kheti hoti thi,
 Ab land ki fusslo ki khatir,
 Humne ise banjar bana diya.

 Munni woh din yaad karo
 Jab luka chipi khelte the,
 Tum lahanga pahan kar aati thi,
 Aur hum usme chup jate the.
 Munna woh din beet gaye,
 Jab hamne tumhe chupaya tha,
 Ab tum to jaat ke bhalu ho,
 Lahange me shahad ka chhatta hai.

 Munni woh din yaad karo,
 Jab sath deewali khele the,
 Tum chut pe tikli rakhti thi ,
 Hum land se foda karte the.
 Munna woh din beet gaye,
 Jab chut pe tikli fodi thi.
 Ab chut hamari pyari hai,
 Aur loda tera bhikhari hai.

 Munni woh din beet gaye
 Han munni woh din beet gaye.
 Ab chut ke darshan ki khatir ,
 Hum chut chalisa padhte hai,
 Par chut nahi darshan deti,
 Hum land se ladte rahte hai.
 Par waqt hamara aayega.
 Jab hum bhi tum ko chodenge,
 Tum land land chillaogi
 Hum chut me danda pelenge.
 Munni munne ko kam na samajh
 Yeh teri phudi chodega..
 Tu pair pakad kar royegi..
 Teri chut me keeel (nails) thokega

Fine

Posted by M K D, Admin

Principal said "If any boy go 2 da gurlz hostel rs. 100 fine for 1st time,
200 rs. for 2nd time, 500 for 3rd time.."
Munna Bhai Bola "Monthly Pass ka kitna lagega mamu"

Chaman Bhai Ka Area

Posted by M K D, Admin

Ek area mein Bhai rehta hai, Chaman Bhai..
Ab uskey area mein jo bhi koi lafda hota hai to police se pehle Chaman Bhai ki adalat mein jaata hai….
Ek baar Chaman Bhai ke area mein rape ho jata hai,
aur jisney game bajayi hoti hai ukso pakad ke Chaman Bhai ke paas leke jatey hain…
Chaman Bhai pehley to bahut shanti se, style mein, us sey baat karta hai… kuch is tarah se…
Chaman : Kya re? Tere ko maloom nahi yeh apun ka area hai?
Mujrim : Haan maloom hai na bhai.
Chaman : Phir kaise himmat ki rape karne ki apun ke area mein?
Mujrim : Ab kya boloon bhai, kismat kharab thi.
Chaman : Chal mere ko sub kuchh sach sach bata kya aur kaise hua?
Mujrim : Abhi kya na… idhar naake pe apun paan khane ke liye aaya…
Chaman : Phir?
Murjim : Apun khade hoke paan kharela tha… aur utne mein samne wali building pe apun ki nazar gayi…
Chaman : Aage bol
Mujrim : Udhar teesre maale pe ek chikni khadi hui thi
Chaman : Phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Apun ko aisa laga ke usne ishaara kiya aane ke liye..
Chaman : Phir tune kya kiya?
Mujrim : Apun socha ke kuchh kaam hoyenga usko…. to apun builidng ke neeche gaya
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Usne Ishare se apun ko upar bulaaya… apun seedi chadte yehich sochrela tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Chal fatafat aage bol
Mujrim : Apun ne usko jaake bola…. kya kaam hai.. kaiko ishara kiya apun ko?
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Phir kya bhai, apun ko usne ghar ke andar kheech liya
Chaman : (Excited) Phir?
Mujrim : Apun ghar me to chala gaya lekin soch raha tha ki "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Aage bol
Mujrim : Usne apun ka haath pakad liya
Chaman : Achcha… Phir?
Mujrim : Sachchi bolta hai bhai haath pakadte hi apun phir socha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Phir kya tha… Usne bola chikne meri pyaas bujha de
Chaman : Phir tu kya bola (Getting Excited)?
Mujrim : Apun kya bolta, usne apna duppata neechey gira diya
Chaman : To phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Apun ke dimag ki dahi ho gaya, kya mamme (boobs) the saali ke…lekin bhai phir bhi apun socha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Phir tune kya kiya?
Mujrim : Apun bola ek-do kiss karega aur chala jayega….. zyada boli to body kaam karenga lekin engine nahi kholney ka…. Aakhir, "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : To phir?
Mujrim : Usne apun ko kheech liya…. sacchi bolta hai bhai aisi katil jawaani apun akkhi life me nahi dekha.
Chaman : Haan, woh to hai…. Tu aage bol (Starts to heat up)
Mujrim : Phir kya tha…. apun ne kiss kiya, mamme (boobs) bhi dabaya…. lekin imaan se bolta hai, soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Aage bol?
Mujrim : Phir usne apni kameez utar di
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Phir salwar, lekin apun ke dil me ekich khayal aa raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : Aage aage?
Mujrim : Phir blouse aur chaddi saali ne sab utar di
Chaman : Sahi mein?
Mujrim : Phir meri pant kheech li.
Chaman : Achcha?
Mujrim : Meri underwear mein haath dal diya.
Chaman : Oh !!
Mujrim : Chaddi utar di meri, lekin apun phir bhi socha "Chaman Bhai k! a area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman : (Getting frustrated).
Mujrim : Phir woh haath phiraane lagi.
Chaman : (Half Boiling)
Mujrim : Phir mooh ghumaane lagi….. phir bhi apun yehi soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman: (About to blast) Aage… aage bol sale….
Mujrim: Chumney Chatney lagi bhaaaaiiii…..lekin bhai kasam se……main yehi soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai….. Lafda nahi karne ka”
Chaman: Abbe teri to…. Chaman Bhai Gaya Maa Chudaney….. tu aage bol!
Mujrim : Yehich…… yehich – apun ne bhi yehi socha bhai…..aur game baja dala.!!!